How to Outwit a Gemini


Geminis get some hate, but they can’t help that they do everything twice as fast and twice as smart as everyone else, y’know? (Yes, you guessed correctly—I am a Gemini.) We’re ruled by Mercury, a planet that knows a thing or three about communication, and we can talk you into doing whatever TF we want before you even realize what’s happening.

Go ahead, text us to rain-check on that FaceTime hang…and suddenly find yourself agreeing to spend your weekend rewatching all 10 seasons of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, followed by our PowerPoint presentation of Erika Jayne conspiracy theories—even though you have a big project due Monday.

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But (sorry to other Gems!) we do have one weakness: When it comes to nonverbal communication, we’re on Duolingo Level 1. So pay close attention to our posture, gestures, and eye contact to figure out what we’re plotting. Then make your move first.

You know how your Gemmy BFF does that sweet lil smile—sans any teeth—when she swears your ex-FWB won’t be at your next distanced group hang? Yeah, she’s trying to Parent Trap you back together.

Don’t call her out—it’s useless trying to win a battle of words—but change the meetup location at the last minute to somewhere your ex hates. Your Gem won’t realize what’s up until it’s too late. Sometimes revenge is even better than a Housewives reunion, no?


P.S. Want more hot-as-hell astro takes? Join Cosmo Unlocked.


Sorry, Geminis! But how about some merch?

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